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Showing posts from October, 2013

Hypocrites, cowards, poltroon, iniquitous... sinful people!

Well I'll be damned. You my barely empty blog and it's cold reflection of my life, I summon you, yes summon to tell you how you are my only slave, friend and tutor. I learned something so cold, its almost making me feel my soul, and suffocated. Something about expectations. The expectation of not love or mercy but rather intelligence or rationality. It's rare. Given you have people all around you and only a few be there to see you tear up, you expect rationality from them. Just that... not more. I have had a brutal experience of relying on people who are apparently very righteous,  but when the time comes they surrender to bias, racist, discriminatory even brutal verdicts. Hypocrites, cowards, poltroon, iniquitous... sinful people! Why would you so much so talk about something you are not ready to implement? The last thing you get, and what you aim to achieve as you deceive with your words, is respect. And since they're close to someone, they often forget they h

When Maa is not around.

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   20 years old, I sit, and make big talks about life miracles and philosophies. Feeling so young in my skin at one end, like I can accomplish all my head can imagine. Where reality is dissimilar - my youth battles it, until one day, or so I presume, old age will tire me out of this battler for new warriors to fight the same way, the same war. Life is a loop. Like a combatant tediously fighting for people and against people (see loop?) I fight impossibilities and perhaps veracity.  ‘Simple’ no more a word to me - but that does not refute its existence. It is as it is. Sitting on a cosy sofa in the company of the cool breeze, all aid to the light shower in the evening and plenty so called ‘intellectual’ books on the side table I wonder why I don’t feel as passive as I should with all the ‘apparent’ thrill of young blood running in my veins and the ‘ideal’ noble framing of my scholarly surroundings. I miss simple. I miss simple emotions. I miss affection, love, care, tenderness and

The stolen glance.

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 'I remember as people roughly cued by to get on the train we looked at each other for a short instance and smiled before she shied her glance away looking down at her shoes or just the floor, I couldn't make out. I was too grasped by the sweetness of it all. Before I knew it - all the people including her had boarded the train; for then I lost her sight, but once inside I tried to casually look for her. Trying to satisfy myself into thinking that it's okay to look around for a stranger like this but failing, thus shuffling my pockets and fixing my coat in a queer manner and soon quitting it to stand still upon realizing how dumb it might come off as. As quickly as my consciousness moved about from finding that girl to fixing my outlook - she appeared. And the  thoughts reversed rapidly from simply fixing my appearance to doing it for   her. Something felt poetic about the situation as I saw her eyes  too  quietly   trying to find someone - Or so I like to think what that

Logical Happiness

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          I am not really sure what I am about to say will end up in coherence or not, but here goes. Have you ever observed how people, even your friends, readily accept to the sad part of things, embracing more promptly the prospects of situations, scenarios and events that bring in them a sense of hopelessness, thus enlarging a picture of self- self victimization. Well, paradoxically I’d do the same if I grab onto this issue, and make you more self conscious as already I am. In any case, that’s not what I am here to talk about. This was just the entrée to what I am preparing for you to hear next.          That is how to introduce the positive in our lives. Also, questioning why sadness is an overpowering emotion, especially in comparison to that which is happy.           I’d tell you why. It’s the lack of motivation, that’s the cause, the lack to actually reach out for the better. I believe that anything in us, to very large extends, be it our mental hea

Sad reality

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A stranger's pain.

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The strongest of bond the heartiest of laughs, O Sister of mine, you redefine what's refine. Held us, you did not by the red in our veins, instead an embrace - oddly comfortingly plain unlike blood itself,  I eventually gain. So powerful,  this agreement - unseen, this knot - imaginary,  but be warn, not just illusionary. Tell me how I question not, who don't believe in the mighty, 'He' also unseen, If something so beautiful exists like you, with me. In winters  one day, like any other with you over a cup of coffee, as comforting as you you poured more than usual, what is the happy you... those oozing secrets, unheard. Withering lips, paling cheeks, moist eyes, how had the summer in you, suddenly changed to the cold outside my view. O sister of mine after years of love for you, I learned, finally discovered, a stranger's pain, and then it hurt.